Giving Thanks
by Dlbn
Summary: He could be miserable. He could be bitter. Instead, he was thankful.


Dedication: Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Loveless or anything from it. it all belongs to Yun Kouga. I make NO money off of writing in this category.

000

Thanksgiving. A holiday in America that celebrated pilgrims and Native Americans, called Indians at the time, ate a large feast together to share in the bounty of the new world. A holiday meant for thanks and gratuity that was overshadowed by the overindulgent need to stuff yourself on that day, and then go out the next day to fight heavy traffic and insane shoppers for deals on new stuff. It was quite contradictory, really. Spending a whole day being thankful for everything you have, and then going out to get more stuff because you're not satisfied with what you were thankful or only hours beforehand. Even though he could appreciate the sentiment, twelve year old Aoyagi Ritsuka didn't understand why one specific day had to be set aside for feeling thankful for the people and the things that you were lucky to have. Shouldn't you feel that way and express it every day? To always let the people you care about _know_ that you care about them and to not be selfish and realize that you _are _lucky to have the things you do, because there were people who didn't have even a fraction of what you had?

000

Ritsuka, personally, was thankful for every day that he got on this green Earth and for every single person that made his life worthwhile. He was lucky to live to see another day with the way his mother abused him; beat him, cut him, stabbed him, injured not only his body, but his emotions, his heart, and his soul as well. If it wasn't for his friends-the Zero brothers, Yuiko, Yayoi, and Shinonome-sensei-he wouldn't have much of a reason to get up in the morning. Truth be told, he had been _broken_ when he found his brother's burnt corpse sitting at his desk at school. When Seimei magically reappeared with not explanation and a smirk at the idea that he had killed people, Ritsuka was _crushed_. And when Seimei came back and took Soubi away from him? Ritsuka was _destroyed_. Why would his brother _do_ that? Fake his death, then return with no explanation, and then take away the one constant protector left in his life? It didn't make sense to the young neko, and he doubted it ever would. People said that Seimei was insane. Maybe they were right.

000

But Ritsuka was thankful for all the time he had with his brother. Though Seimei's behavior was slightly incestuous towards him and was a mask to hide his true side, it felt as though those memories were of the real Seimei and thus, Ritsuka was thankful to have them. Happy memories of playing with Seimei as kids and Seimei coming to his rescue when their mother tried to injured him tended to overshadow ones like Seimei faking his death, or the dark look that would caress his features when he got annoyed with their mother. Every kind word, every gentle touch, every small laugh, every little grin; it all meant more then Ritsuka could ever express.

000

Although he was betrayed and his heart was broken, Ritsuka couldn't deny that he was also thankful for Soubi and their 'relationship'. Whatever it was defined as. Every hug, every touch, every kiss may have stemmed from an order from Seimei and Soubi's innate need to be accepted by his sacrifice, it sure felt real. Ritsuka was glad for those gentle touches, when he was used to closed fist hits from his mother and open palmed slaps. Every 'I love you, Ritsuka' outweighed at least a dozen 'you're not my Ritsuka, give him back to me!' Every hug made up for every shove. Every bandage made up for every injury. Day by day, Ritsuka could feel his heart and soul being repaired and old wounds being closed. Even though Soubi was gone away now with Seimei-for who knew _how_ long-he was still thankful for all the memories, moments, and love that he shared with the man. They were all tacked to a 10x10 corkboard next to his bed.

000

Although he found the Zero boys to be rather rude, foulmouthed, annoying, and-he had to admit-funny at times, he _was_ thankful for them being there. If it wasn't for them, he had no idea what he would have done in the first few days after Soubi left. His crippling depression and never ending tears surely would have been the death of him if they hadn't been there to keep his head calm and level and keep him focused on the goal. Sure, Yoji was a complete jerk about it at first, but it could have been the shock at Soubi's betrayal of the raven haired neko that had caused that, not Yoji being a jerk simply out of spite or because he could.

000

He was also thankful for Yuiko, Yayoi, and his sensei, Shinonome-sensei. Yuiko's bubbly, carefree attitude that was laced with hidden IQ points was just the break he needed from the stress and hells he endured on a daily basis. Yayoi was always at the ready with some mindless activity that they could all do together on their day off from school. If only for a few hours, he could forget about spells and battles and Soubi and Seimei. He could just have fun and let loose. As for his sensei, she always seemed to know exactly what he was thinking and exactly what to say to cheer him up or offer the right advice that he did need to hear at that point in time, even if he didn't know it was what he needed to hear.

000

He could sit there and complain about his life. He could complain how the people who said they loved him lied to him, hurt him, and abandoned him without thinking or caring of the consequences of their actions or what effect it would have on him. He could complain that his name was really his fate and that he hated the world and everyone and everything in it. But instead of moping and complaining, Ritsuka chose to be thankful for what he _did_ have. Not mourn what he _lost_. Soubi would come back one day, and Seimei probably would too. His memory would one day return and he'd finally know the complete truth. He'd grow up and get older and wiser, and he wouldn't be hurt by simple, childish things anymore. But while he awaited that day, he'd just be thankful for what he had. Because some people weren't even lucky enough to get that.


End file.
